A conversation between two students in the lift this morning:

There was a lot of snow overnight, therefore students were sparse in college. Two of them however braved the weather and gave me a great jolly along in the lift:

Student 1: "I'm the only one in today"
Student 2: "Yes, so am I"

What logic, and, oh! I must have been invisible!!

I've been coughing all morning, so I'm off to A&E

Sounds serious!? They probably made him sit coughing for another eight hours in the waiting room before someone told him he had a cough!

If I promise to come in every day next week, can I take tomorrow off?

I know there's logic in there somewhere, but I'm not sure I can find it.

I stood on my hair straighteners

Poor old Craig. He'll be hot to trot for a while!

Why do we have to learn so much?

This was a question asked by one of my stroppiest students. He had no idea how ridiculous he was being!

I'm not sure I'm on the right course

Thank God I'm not a teenager anymore! This young man doesn't know what he wants to do or how to go about no doing it. I hope our little chat helped him to uncloud his mind a bit.

It was sooo windy I couldn't keep my coat on

This has got to be the lamest excuse I've ever heard!

Nobody told me I had to do any work.

Bless you Jamie, you may have realised that nobody's going to do your study for you, but maybe if you get a job somebody might just do all of your work because you don't know how. Anybody think he'll drop lucky?