Sorry I just got up because I have a cold from falling into Leeds and Liverpool canal yesterday, so I'm not going to be in today

This one's hot off the press! The probability of this actually being true is quite high, as this student is, well, shall we say 'a strong candidate for such an occurance'! The fact that all classes have been cancelled today due to the extreme weather seems to have passed him by. Maybe he should show up to college a little more regularly and then he may have known!!!